I have been so blessed as to have grown up in a happy home with both parents, happily married. Hubs, same situation. We have great examples of lasting marriages set before us because they took time out to appreciate the other one. Don't get me wrong, I love P and everything about her and I would do literally anything for her safety and happiness. Anything. But I honestly believe her happiness will be derived of how happy the home she grows up in is. If I let my marriage fall apart, push my husband to the side while I put others first, and don't appreciate and love the crap out of him everyday, what kind of home life am I creating for my daughter? What kind of example am I setting for her when it comes to the ideals of a healthy and loving relationship?
So yes, I put my husband first. I kiss him before he leaves the house, even if that means P needs to fuss for a few seconds. I greet him when he gets home from work, I make dinner almost every night of the week and keep the house clean...I understand his needs and strive to meet them. Don't worry, P's needs are met too, her needs will never come second, but my marriage is my number one priority.
I work hard in this relationship. I have invested time, sweat, tears, my heart and my future. I can't throw all that away because I didn't care enough about my husband to make him feel special every once in awhile. I need him. I need his help, his support and his love. Without my partner, my home is broken and my parenting effectiveness will plummet. P needs both of her parents, and she needs both her parents to love and respect eachother. She needs to see what a healthy relationship is so that she can grow up to invest herself in a healthy relationship. She is learning what love is and that you should treat the ones you love with kindness. She is learning that we are together and we are a family and that we will always be there for her. We're her team.
So no, I will not put my baby or any other future children before my husband. My marriage comes first. It has to. For the sake of my family, for the future health and happiness of my daughter, my marriage will come first.
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